Who's in Charge Around Here, Anyway?

Although, most people don't think that they're at the mercy of their thoughts, they do seem to feel as though they're at the mercy of their feelings. And since our feelings are such tangible phenomena, that appear to arise and thrive independently, most think their emotions happen to them, as well.

It's true that feelings just bubble up within us. But we're no more obligated to sustain them, than we are any other notions that may arise in the realms of recollection, fantasy or conjecture. Our emotional capacities are merely for consideration, as another “sense” with which we can interpret our world.

Problems begin when we give them too much credit and cling to them for whatever reasons. Fixation can produce fabulous talent, glorious art and wondrous invention. But it can also lead to debilitating emotional states and compulsive neurosis.

We have a kind of gravitational attraction that lures thoughts and feelings, and causes them to stick to us - until they're dislodged by the next one, or intentionally brushed off.

Any notion that begins to sprout, whether it's destined for an emotional or conceptual birthing, is ours to attend to or ignore. This, either as we see fit, or as we blissfully tool along, in auto pilot. (Ignorance being bliss, that is.)

It's easy to get caught up in the dramas that we fabricate inside of our heads. It's like the ones that grab us through the TV. Stories have their own “static cling”, which adds to our natural gravitational force, making them even harder to keep at arms length. They can make us feel really good, and can be positive experiences - or the contrary. The inner stories feel real, in the same way that movies feels real, when we allow ourselves to get caught up in them. But the inner story doesn't turn off. It never stops being written, and re-edited. And our selves are defined by our stories.

Or so the story teller would like us to believe.

We can learn to take our stories more like novels being read to us, and see them as just one accounting. A single sampling of the bigger unfolding. We develop an awareness of the space between us and our dramas. Then we can see that our emotions are responses to how life is relating to our sensibilities. Those sensibilities, being a reflection of our stories. And so, we see that they have no realness outside of the attention that we give to them.

The clearer our perspective, the easier to be free of our emotions. Not free, as in “devoid of”, but rather, as “not a slave to”. But it isn't necessary to hold a saintly overview to begin to take charge. Simply imagining that it's possible and daring to step out of your habituated and/or knee jerk patterns, is really all it takes. Then it's just a matter of practice.