Most people live in a fantasy world. They think that their likes and dislikes, their strengths and weaknesses, their hobbies and careers, their families and cultures, their hopes and their dreams all indicate who they are. They're comfortably nestled into the idea that their happiness and success depends on how their lives unfold in relation to this sense of their selves. They've spent their whole lives constructing their images, with enthusiastic encouragement from others. The last thing they want to hear is that their world views are delusional and that they have to dismantle and discard them, if they want to know the truth.
By simply saying that, it's likely that I've just lost a portion of my readers, already.
Speaking this truth directly and without pretense will bounce off of any brain not willing and open to accepting and absorbing it. But this is the way it is. So then, how can a teacher coax people onto a path of spiritual evolution?
It becomes necessary to speak falsely. To promise treasures and greatness for the illusory self, knowing full well that the best prizes don't present themselves until after one has seen through the illusion. The hope being that, once students are dedicated to a path, the false phrasings can be replaced with more accurate depictions.
But, until people release their preconceptions, the truth can't take root. More accurate phrasing might inspire sufficient curiosity to motivate one beyond preconceptions, but hearing descriptions of the indescribable isn't a suitable substitute for the experiences a teacher strives to lead his/her students to.
Pushing too hard will end in rejection and dismissal. Too light a touch won't move students out of their comfort zones. And there's no right touch for all occasions or all students. So a teacher must have a clear sense of where her students are developmentally, know how receptive they are, hone a heightened sensitivity to each students real time reactions, and be able to adjust her words and intensity, on the fly.
The self, the body, families and needs don't evaporate. It's not about destroying the ego and relinquishing all ambitions. It's more a matter of gaining a better understanding of the relationships between the different aspects of self, consciousness and awareness. And then, adopting more appropriate priorities and attitudes.
It's akin to a child realizing that her stuffed animals don't really have feelings or that he's not actually a master ninja. From one perspective, it's a pity to lose the illusion, but the truth is what it is. It's a no brainer which version of reality is better to choose to live within.
No kids want to be told that their fantasies are silly child stuff, and it's certainly not a fun job to do so. But it's an important job that, at some point in time, needs to be done, for the good of the children and the world that they will inherit responsibility for.
So an effective teacher must be tender and loving, patient and kind, helpful and nurturing, respectful and understanding - all without being pushy or demanding. He must simultaneously be motivator and supporter, scout and guide, master and servant. Of course, no one can be all things to all people. He can only strive to provide what aspirants who arrive seeking guidance need, in a form that's digestible for them.
May all teachers continue to learn and grow into the best examples that they can be, and may they lead as many others as they can, forward, in their journeys, for the good of us all.
Om shanti, shanti, shanti
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Letting Go - The Art of Surrender
When meditating, it seems like there is a thing to do, a right way to do it and something to be attained by doing so. This very notion will keep anything substantial from happening. It creates a scenario something like trying to walk one's way into a comfortable seated position.
True, there are many recommended techniques for strengthening focus or concentration. But these practices are only the doorway, and if one doesn't put the threshold behind him, there'll be no play time in the larger expanses, which is, after all, the grander intention.
Meditation is a practice of surrender.
When thoughts or images lure us away from the object, it's not a matter of correcting an error and getting it right. We just need to let go of the distraction, let go of any urge to see where it wants to take us, let go of self judgment, let go of preconceptions and fall back into the practice.
We surrender our memories and our fantasies, our roles and our obligations, our ambitions and our identities. I'm reminded of a Peanuts comic strip where Charlie Brown was bundled up in so many clothes that he couldn't move. We need to shed layer after layer until we gain the freedom and flexibility that we seek.
Once a settled mind is established as the primary way of being, we can work to distill our sense of self to its purest essence and then begin to move beyond the individual, to global, then universal, consciousness. Beyond consciousness lies unadorned awareness. None of which can be experienced while the ego is driving.
The journey into a meditation is like making a paper airplane. Our intention shapes the wings and our will provides the thrust. But at some point, we have to let go and let it take flight. Otherwise, our meditation is like a kid holding onto his plane and “flying” it around in fantasy.
We have to ignore the man who is the curtain before we can unveil, and then see through, the man behind the curtain.
As long as we cling to our image of who or what we think we are, we'll never be able to move beyond it – to reveal our true nature, to feel our connection with the whole and to discover the enduring contentment that simply is, when life is no longer seen as revolving around false notions of self.
To invite a greater understanding and to allow life to be what it is. To let go of certainty. To surrender to the truth, whatever it may be. This is the wish that spawned the practice of meditation.
May all beings know truth. May all beings know peace.
Namaste
True, there are many recommended techniques for strengthening focus or concentration. But these practices are only the doorway, and if one doesn't put the threshold behind him, there'll be no play time in the larger expanses, which is, after all, the grander intention.
Meditation is a practice of surrender.
When thoughts or images lure us away from the object, it's not a matter of correcting an error and getting it right. We just need to let go of the distraction, let go of any urge to see where it wants to take us, let go of self judgment, let go of preconceptions and fall back into the practice.
We surrender our memories and our fantasies, our roles and our obligations, our ambitions and our identities. I'm reminded of a Peanuts comic strip where Charlie Brown was bundled up in so many clothes that he couldn't move. We need to shed layer after layer until we gain the freedom and flexibility that we seek.
Once a settled mind is established as the primary way of being, we can work to distill our sense of self to its purest essence and then begin to move beyond the individual, to global, then universal, consciousness. Beyond consciousness lies unadorned awareness. None of which can be experienced while the ego is driving.
The journey into a meditation is like making a paper airplane. Our intention shapes the wings and our will provides the thrust. But at some point, we have to let go and let it take flight. Otherwise, our meditation is like a kid holding onto his plane and “flying” it around in fantasy.
We have to ignore the man who is the curtain before we can unveil, and then see through, the man behind the curtain.
As long as we cling to our image of who or what we think we are, we'll never be able to move beyond it – to reveal our true nature, to feel our connection with the whole and to discover the enduring contentment that simply is, when life is no longer seen as revolving around false notions of self.
To invite a greater understanding and to allow life to be what it is. To let go of certainty. To surrender to the truth, whatever it may be. This is the wish that spawned the practice of meditation.
May all beings know truth. May all beings know peace.
Namaste
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Ambassadors of Joy
We get stuck in emotional states, and our recollection of repeated moods sets our impressions of who we are; and further, dictates how we affect those around us.
I know it feels like emotions happen to us like the weather. Something blows in and changes the way we feel. We become cold and shaky or hot and sweaty or pleasantly refreshed and elated. This is how it seems because this is our experience of how it's felt. However, this is not how it is.
Emotions may spring up spontaneously, but they won't linger unless invited to do so. We have to give them our attention and our thoughts, as water and food, to sustain them.
It is, perhaps, easier to see how this works with thoughts. A thought enters our field of perception. Maybe we focus on it, maybe not. If we don't, it disappears in a flash. It may, or may not, return later. If we water it with our attention and feed it with our emotional energy, it takes root and grows accordingly. Caring holds our interest and attention gives it fuel to flourish.
When we feel something, we can choose to pay attention to it, or not.
Upon getting startled, there's a momentary rush of fear. Once we see that the loud noise doesn't represent imminent danger, we let go and it quickly resides.
Even when embroiled in a feeling, we can shift in an instant.
Think about an occasion when you were angry, stressed or worried and the phone rang. Out of a sense of social expectation, you automatically answer in a courteous and cheerful tone. If it's a friend and you're drawn into a pleasant conversation, rather than recounting your mood and its perceived causes, you quickly find yourself feeling good.
Fortunately, a phone call isn't a prerequisite for shifting our focus and changing our mood.
If you pause and reminisce about a happy occasion, you'll begin to feel lightness and warmth. If you reflect on a frustrating memory, you'll feel tighter and closed off. In any given moment, we have the capacity to choose and change our feeling. All you need to do is imagine and invite it, and will appear.
There's a buffet in front of us, all the time. If a bite tastes sour or bitter, spit it out. Select another dish that tastes healthful and pleasing, and refresh your pallet.
It's really that easy; but then again, it's really not – at least, initially. We have habits, expectations and recollections of ourselves that includes being swept around in the currents of random feelings. Additionally, familiarity breeds comfort, so as bad as they may feel, we can be strangely drawn to them. Sometimes people hold beliefs that they deserve such ill feelings. And others commonly try to influence us because they want us to be like them, as the quality of their lives shift at the whims of their feelings.
Training and reprogramming are necessary, as well as, reframing the way we see our relationship with our emotions. It's a process and an evolution that takes diligence and time. There will be back sliding and doubt along the way. But as we start to see the results and notice the improvement in our lives, beyond how we feel, we gain inspiration and build momentum.
When we feel better, we're more connected to our lives and more open to others around us. Whatever our moods, they're infectious, and if we maintain positive attitudes, we inspire others to become better beings, themselves. Both through this immediate contact, and via our resonance with the fabric of existence, we influence the greater consciousness toward a higher evolution when we intentionally direct our feelings, as an on going practice.
Breathe and smile.
I know it feels like emotions happen to us like the weather. Something blows in and changes the way we feel. We become cold and shaky or hot and sweaty or pleasantly refreshed and elated. This is how it seems because this is our experience of how it's felt. However, this is not how it is.
Emotions may spring up spontaneously, but they won't linger unless invited to do so. We have to give them our attention and our thoughts, as water and food, to sustain them.
It is, perhaps, easier to see how this works with thoughts. A thought enters our field of perception. Maybe we focus on it, maybe not. If we don't, it disappears in a flash. It may, or may not, return later. If we water it with our attention and feed it with our emotional energy, it takes root and grows accordingly. Caring holds our interest and attention gives it fuel to flourish.
When we feel something, we can choose to pay attention to it, or not.
Upon getting startled, there's a momentary rush of fear. Once we see that the loud noise doesn't represent imminent danger, we let go and it quickly resides.
Even when embroiled in a feeling, we can shift in an instant.
Think about an occasion when you were angry, stressed or worried and the phone rang. Out of a sense of social expectation, you automatically answer in a courteous and cheerful tone. If it's a friend and you're drawn into a pleasant conversation, rather than recounting your mood and its perceived causes, you quickly find yourself feeling good.
Fortunately, a phone call isn't a prerequisite for shifting our focus and changing our mood.
If you pause and reminisce about a happy occasion, you'll begin to feel lightness and warmth. If you reflect on a frustrating memory, you'll feel tighter and closed off. In any given moment, we have the capacity to choose and change our feeling. All you need to do is imagine and invite it, and will appear.
There's a buffet in front of us, all the time. If a bite tastes sour or bitter, spit it out. Select another dish that tastes healthful and pleasing, and refresh your pallet.
It's really that easy; but then again, it's really not – at least, initially. We have habits, expectations and recollections of ourselves that includes being swept around in the currents of random feelings. Additionally, familiarity breeds comfort, so as bad as they may feel, we can be strangely drawn to them. Sometimes people hold beliefs that they deserve such ill feelings. And others commonly try to influence us because they want us to be like them, as the quality of their lives shift at the whims of their feelings.
Training and reprogramming are necessary, as well as, reframing the way we see our relationship with our emotions. It's a process and an evolution that takes diligence and time. There will be back sliding and doubt along the way. But as we start to see the results and notice the improvement in our lives, beyond how we feel, we gain inspiration and build momentum.
When we feel better, we're more connected to our lives and more open to others around us. Whatever our moods, they're infectious, and if we maintain positive attitudes, we inspire others to become better beings, themselves. Both through this immediate contact, and via our resonance with the fabric of existence, we influence the greater consciousness toward a higher evolution when we intentionally direct our feelings, as an on going practice.
Breathe and smile.
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