Happy New You!

While an incomplete realization, understanding that one's self is pliable and ever-changing on an intellectual level, gives one the leverage to reconstruct his/her sand castle self in a more favorable form. As the new year inspires making changes, let's address some fundamentals of making changes that stick.

First, it's necessary to spend some serious time contemplating the change(s). How will this be of benefit to self and others? Don't just make a cursory answer, but feel how important this is on an intimately deep level. This is how you generate sustainable motivation.

You must then create a new self image. (One can't think of himself as a smoker and expect to quit smoking, successfully.) Again, this will take a fair amount of dedicated time to manifest a clear and heart felt image of a new you. Reflecting on the motivation generated, nurtures a strong sense that what you want most of all is to be this new self that you're imagining.

Be prepared to deal with others who hold an image of the old you in their minds. They may project scepticism or even try to coerce you into having that drink or smoke or piece of cake, because they are uncomfortable with the notion of changing their own preconceptions.

Be kind to yourself if you waver and see it as a part of the process of recreation, rather than failure. If you spend time sitting in the mud feeling angry at, or sorry for, yourself the wagon will roll away without you. If/when you fall, jump right back on with forgiveness and compassion. Allow time for the new you to gell.

Our perspective of time is always shifting, and the greatest challenges will come when you're seeing the in the smallest frame. Practice pulling back, seeing the long term, the bigger picture, the you that you wish to be.

Continue to return to the practices of strengthening your motivation, confirming your priorities and defining who you really want to be. It will likely need to be a daily practice to begin with. How quickly you can relax this and still maintain the requisite levels of motivation and clarification, is up to you to decide.

Think of yourself as a child, growing, learning and developing into more than you are. Be accepting and patient. Give yourself time to improve and evolve, knowing that it's a never ending process. Appreciate yourself, in all your stages of development.

Enjoy the journey, in all its guises.